Does it Matter How I Feel?

If you have ever read through the Psalms, you may have noticed many of the Psalmists are full of big emotions and feelings. Some of the Psalms express anger, grief, sorrow, and worry but also end with worshipping God or putting faith in God. What we can glean from this is emotions and feelings are a part of life, but also, don’t stay in those emotions.

Psalm 42:3-11 in The Passion Translation says, Day and night my tears keep falling and my heart keeps crying for your help, while my enemies mock me over and over, saying, ‘Where is this God of yours? Why doesn’t he help you?’ So I speak over my heartbroken soul, ‘Take courage. Remember when you used to be right out in front leading the procession of praise when the great crowd of worshipers gathered to go into the presence of the Lord? You shouted with joy as the sound of passionate celebration filled the air and the joyous multitude of lovers honored the feast of the Lord!’ So then, my soul, why would you be depressed? Why would you sink into despair? Just keep hoping and waiting on God, your Savior. For no matter what, I will sing with praise, for you are my saving grace! Here I am depressed and downcast. Yet I will still remember you as I ponder the place where your glory streams down from the mighty mountaintops, lofty and majestic – the mountains of your awesome presence. My deep need calls out to the deep kindness of your love. Your waterfall of weeping sent waves of sorrow over my soul, carrying me away, cascading over me like a thundering cataract. All through the day Yahweh has commanded his endless love to pour over me. Through the night I sing his songs and my praises to the living God. I will say to God, ‘You are my mountain of strength; how could you forget me? Why must I suffer the vile oppression of my enemies? These heartless tormentors who are out to kill me?’ Their wounding words pierce my heart over and over while they say, ‘Where is this god of yours?’ So I say to my soul, ‘Don’t be discouraged. Don’t be disturbed. For I know my God will break through for me.’ Then I’ll have plenty of reasons to praise him all over again. Yes! He is my saving grace!”

The Psalmist here is experiencing sadness, depression maybe even some frustration. However, even as he expresses his feelings, he reminds himself who God is and what God has done for Him, and what God is still doing for him. He cheers himself up and chooses not to stay in the place of sadness because he knows who God is. He is choosing to magnify God instead of his problems. 

Many of us growing up, especially in the church, were taught to suppress our emotions and feelings. The general feeling was to stuff the emotion, put your head down, and keep it moving. Performance Christianity lends itself to the thought process that if you are a “good” Christian, then you shouldn’t experience negative emotions. Not a great way to deal with emotions and feelings. 

Today, our pendulum has swung very far the other way. People are so caught up in their feelings that it becomes “their truth.” So instead of ignoring emotions. We are going to magnify them to the point that they are bigger than God and what He says. The problem with that is that everyone has their own version of truth, and it becomes difficult to find common ground. 

The truth is God created emotions and feelings for a reason. In fact, God has emotions. When Jesus was here on earth, he himself experienced anger, grief, and joy, among other things. We are created in the image of God, so of course, we have feelings and emotions as well. We were created that way.

Growing up as a Christian, one of the emotions that was not really acceptable was anger. Nice Christian girls did not get angry. Instead of acknowledging anger in a healthy way and dealing with it, I would just avoid it. That, to say the least, did not work out for me well. 

A couple of years ago, I was dealing with a relationship that was producing a lot of anger in me. I felt guilty about it and was just trying to avoid the anger, but in doing so, I was doing damage to the relationship. Finally, the Holy Spirit spoke to me and said your anger is not wrong. Your anger is a signal that there is something wrong in the relationship. Your boundaries are being violated, and your choosing not to deal with it is doing damage to the relationship. 

That woke me up. The anger was not wrong, but my trying to avoid the anger was making the relationship worse. This gave me the courage to put in some good boundaries, and the relationship was much healthier after that. 

Philippians 4:6 (NKJV) “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.” 

We were meant to experience emotions and feelings. When the Bible says, “Be anxious for nothing…” the message isn’t that you will never experience anxiety. Or if you do experience anxiety, you are a bad Christian. The message is when you experience anxiety, this is what you should do. 

2 Timothy 1:7 “For God will never give you the spirit of fear, but the Holy Spirit who gives you mighty power, love, and self-control.”

This Bible verse is included because Paul was trying to encourage Timothy, who was clearly struggling with fear. Paul was reminding Timothy that the fear he was feeling did not come from God and encouraging him to turn to the Holy Spirit who had good things to give Timothy.  

Your feelings do matter. I think when it becomes a problem is when the negative feelings and emotions are allowed in the driver’s seat of our lives. If you are ruled by negative emotions and feelings, it can have a far-reaching impact on your spiritual, mental, and physical health. I think that is why the Lord addresses feelings and ways to switch to a positive emotion. 

There are also times when your emotions can drive you closer to God. In Mark 5, beginning in verse 25, there is a story of a woman with the issue of blood. This woman had been dealing with her illness for twelve years. The Bible says she had been to every doctor and spent a lot of money and was worse off than when she had begun. We can speculate that she felt tired, overwhelmed, frustrated, worried, and, most of all, desperate. What did all those feelings lead her to do?

It led her into a great act of faith. She was not supposed to be in the crowd with Jesus that day. Her sickness would have made her unclean, and it was against the law for her to approach anyone. However, in her desperation, she reasoned that if she could just touch the hem of Jesus’ garment, she would be made well. 

Her feeling of desperation caused her to step out in faith. She approached Jesus and did indeed touch the hem of His garment. She knew immediately that she had been healed. She received her victory. 

Feelings can often be layered and tangled and complicated. However, they can also be used to bring us into deeper relationship with God. Whatever feeling you are dealing with, I encourage you to search the scripture for God’s solutions. Maybe it is to praise and magnify the Lord rather than your problem. Maybe it is learning to rest and abide in God. Maybe it is learning to trust Him at a deeper level. 

Whatever it is, isn’t it amazing to know He already has the solution? God is not scared of your feelings. He created them. However, He also knows as humans how easy it is for us to default to those feelings rather than the victory we already have in HIm.

Remember, friend, God loves you more than you can understand. He is always for you, never against you.  He created you to be victorious. He wants you to run to Him with your feelings and learn to abide in Him.  

Check out the other great posts!

Simple Is Better: When Feelings are Anything But Simple by Dianne Vielhuber

When Emotions Feel Too Big by Ashley Olivine

Leashes of Responsibility: Feeling My Dog’s Anxiety and My Own Need for Control by Lisa Crowder

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